A BEREAVED Coventry woman is sharing her story of Boxing Day heartbreak to raise awareness of the cancer which took her mother’s life one year ago.
Gurbaksh Dhesi, 55, poured her whole heart into the Christmas holidays – but last year, just hours after the celebration she adored more than any other, Gurbaksh passed away from pancreatic cancer.
Her daughter, Kashie, still speaks of her mother as if she might walk through the door at any moment, apron on, spices in hand, ready to feed an army.
She said: “Mum’s whole world was her family. She made every Christmas feel like a storybook. The food, the laughter, the way she cared for us… she made everything feel special.”
Gurbaksh remembered everyone’s favourite dishes, stayed up late preparing trays of treats, and insisted on sending guests home with leftovers wrapped in foil and warmth. Her Christmas table wasn’t simply a meal – it was an expression of devotion.
But in the weeks before Christmas 2024, her energy had begun to fade. She mentioned stomach pain, ate a little less, and was more tired than usual – but nothing that hinted at what was to come.
By the time she was finally diagnosed, the cancer had already spread too far.
On Boxing Day morning, with the tree still lit and the remnants of Christmas still scattered around the room, the family gathered at Gurbaksh’s side as she slipped away.
Kashie said: “I had mentally prepared myself for the possibility that we might only have a few months with her, but I never imagined it would be reduced to just days. The speed at which pancreatic cancer took her life is something I still struggle to comprehend.
“Mum loved Christmas more than anyone. Losing her the day after has changed this time of year forever for us. It will never feel the same.”
Kashie is now sharing her mother’s story because she hopes it might save someone else’s.
“If one family recognises the symptoms earlier because of Mum, if one person gets diagnosed sooner, then her story will have made a difference,” she said.
Pancreatic cancer is one of the hardest cancers to recognise.
Mr Neville Menezes, Consultant Pancreatic Surgeon at Ashford and St Peters Hospital NHS Foundation Trust, said: “Pancreatic cancer can develop quietly. By the time symptoms become severe, the disease is often advanced. Recognising subtle changes in your body and acting quickly can make all the difference.”
He outlined the key symptoms that should never be ignored, especially if you experience them together:
- Persistent upper abdominal or back pain that doesn’t go away and does not respond to medical treatment.
- Unexplained weight loss, or loss of appetite.
- Jaundice, where the skin or eyes turn yellow, often accompanied by dark urine or pale stools.
- New-onset diabetes, particularly in people over 50 with no family history, or if it appears suddenly despite a healthy diet and healthy lifestyle.
- Digestive issues, such as nausea, indigestion, bloating, or changes in bowel habits that are persisting for no apparent reason.
- Itchy skin, which can occur before jaundice appears.
“These symptoms don’t always mean pancreatic cancer,” added Mr Menezes. “But if they persist for more than four weeks, it’s crucial to see your GP to make sure that these are not serious symptoms.”
This December, Pancreatic Cancer Action has launched the Gift of Time campaign to encourage people to donate in memory of a loved one they have lost to pancreatic cancer, to fund awareness campaigns and research into earlier diagnosis.
Visit https://tinyurl.com/5ez76akm to donate.
